Riddles of Marriage: “The Pendulum Effect”

Riddles of Marriage: "The Pendulum Effect"As soon as our women get married, they are divinely endowed with the gift of wisdom and determination. This is a great blessing on our nation because as soon as our men get married, they are suddenly deprived of both. Hence, their dependence upon their wives becomes unprecedented, and unquestionable.

After marriage I realized that wisdom has a mysterious side and that determination is another word for patience-till-your-brain-bleeds. In this newly discovered wisdom it is easy, and actually preferred, to take completing opposing decisions after unspecified time intervals for no apparent reason at all. Could you pass me the glass. No! don’t pass me the glass. Why didn’t you pass me the glass? Cancel your meeting. No! don’t cancel the meeting. Why haven’t you canceled your meeting? Take me out to dinner tonight. I don’t want to go to dinner tonight! Can’t we go out to eat dinner tonight?

Of course the secret of our successful marriages lie within our blind obedience to our wives. And of course I realize the blessing of taking away my wisdom and determination at marriage, how else would I ever have been able to handle such situations.